Top 50 Humour Quotes, Humor Sayings, Funny Humour Wishes And SMS Messsages

Humour Quotes And Humor Sayings

Humour Quotes And Humor Sayings

‘The meaning of life is that it stops.’ – Franz Kafta

It takes so little to make a stranger’s day, and even less to totally ruin it. ~Demetri Martin

If all else fails, immortality can always be assured by spectacular error. ~John Kenneth Galbraith

‘There is no cure for birth or death save to enjoy the interval.’ – George Santayana

A celebrity is a person who works hard all his life to become well known, then wears dark glasses to avoid being recognized. ~Fred Allen

All my life, I always wanted to be somebody. Now I see that I should have been more specific. ~Jane Wagner

‘Plan for this world as if you expect to live forever; but plan for the hereafter as if you expect to die tomorrow.’ – Ibn Gabirol

If you teach your children nothing else, teach them the Golden Rule and “righty-tighty, lefty-loosey.” ~Robert Brault

Say what you will about the Ten Commandments, you must always come back to the pleasant fact that there are only ten of them. ~H.L. Mencken

Anybody can win, unless there happens to be a second entry. ~George Ade

‘Life is something to do when you can’t get to sleep.’ – Fran Lebowitz

An expert is a man who tells you a simple thing in a confused way in such a fashion as to make you think the confusion is your own fault. ~William Castle

A compromise is an agreement whereby both parties get what neither of them wanted. ~Author Unknown

Also Read

Attitude Quotes
Happiness Quotes

The only thing that stops God from sending another flood is that the first one was useless. ~Nicholas Chamfort

‘My advice to those who are about to begin, in earnest, the journey of life, is to take their heart in one hand and a club in the other’. – Josh Billings

The remarkable thing about Shakespeare is that he really is very good, in spite of all the people who say he is very good. ~Robert Graves ~best Humour Quotes ~

‘Saving is a very find thing. Especially when your parents have done it for you.’ – Churchill.

The ships hung in the sky in much the same way that bricks don’t. ~Douglas Adams

‘If we can’t be free, we at least can be cheap.’ – Frank Zappa

The surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that it has never tried to contact us. ~Bill Watterson,

‘There is nothing more demoralizing than a small but adequate income.’ – Edmund Wilson

Today is the last day of some of your life. ~ Humour Quotes ~

‘Retirement means twice as much husband and half as much money.’ – Anon

Bad humour is an evasion of reality; good humour is an acceptance of it. Malcolm Muggeridge

‘Early to rise and early to bed, makes a man healthy, wealthy and dead.’ – James Thurber

Laughter gives us distance. It allows us to step back from an event, deal with it and then move on. Bob Newhart ~Humour Quotes~

Humour is a great vehicle for getting a message across: If you get too serious, you could die of starch. Cyndi Lauper

Laughter is a social sanction against inflexible behaviour, which requires a momentary anaesthesia of the heart. Henri Bergson

Humour is a reminder that no matter how high the throne one sits on, one sits on one’s bottom. Taki

Laughter is the shortest distance between two people. Victor Borge

Humour is also a way of saying something serious. T S Eliot

Life literally abounds in comedy if you just look around you. Mel Brooks ~ Humour Quotes ~

Humour is just another defence against the universe. Mel Brooks

Mark my words, when a society has to resort to the lavatory for its humour, the writing is on the wall. Alan Bennett ~famous Humour Quotes~

Humour is merely tragedy standing on its head with its pants torn. Irvin S. Cobb

Perhaps I know best why it is man alone who laughs; he alone suffers so deeply that he had to invent laughter. Friedrich Nietzsche

Humour is perhaps a sense of intellectual perspective: an awareness that some things are really important, others not; and that the two kinds are most oddly jumbled in everyday affairs. Christopher Morley ~Sense of Humour Quotes~

So many tangles in life are ultimately hopeless that we have no appropriate sword other than laughter. Gordon W. Allport

Laughter is a tranquilizer with no side effects. Arnold Glasow

The kind of humour I like is that which makes me laugh for five seconds and think for ten minutes. William Davis ~Humour Quotes~

Humour is reason gone mad. Groucho Marx

There is more logic in humour than in anything else. Because, you see, humour is truth. Victor Borge

Humour is the great thing, the saving thing. The minute it crops up, all our irritation and resentments slip away and a sunny spirit takes their place. Mark Twain ~ Humour Quotes ~

Through humour, you can soften some of the worst blows that life delivers. And once you find laughter, no matter how painful your situation might be, you can survive it. Bill Cosby Best Humour Quotes

Humour is an affirmation of dignity, a declaration of man’s superiority to all that befalls him. Roman Gary

What monstrous absurdities and paradoxes have resisted whole batteries of serious arguments, and then crumbled swiftly into dust before the ringing death-knell of a laugh! Agnes Repplier Humour Quotes

Humour is emotional chaos remembered in tranquillity. James Thurber

To truly laugh, you must be able to take your pain, and play with it! Charlie Chaplin

Humour is the instinct for taking pain playfully. Max Eastman

If you could choose one characteristic that would get you through life, choose a sense of humour. Jennifer Jones

You may also like...